A "simple" holiday?

Since we have committed to a simplicity lifestyle, every holiday season has the same goal for my family: unhurried joy. And every year we struggle with the same things that threaten to tear down the peace we've built. Here are my thoughts on staying true to your holiday vision:

Continuously simplify your giving

I always think I have my simplicity game on point until the inevitable happens. Last year, I decided to personally make as many gifts as possible. I thought it would be cheap and streamline my giv ing, as I was only making jams and bath soaks. Which actually meant, in addition to consumable and frugal, I had put the added stress of handmade on my plate. I enjoyed making the gifts. I had carefully carved out the time, and I was extremely pleased with how they came out. Win! And then I realized I still had to ship all of these (heavy) things to our extended family in WV and KY.  Three trips to the post office, and one to UPS, had me wondering if I should have just sent gifts from Amazon and Harry and David (again). The crowds, the grumpiness, and the cost all did their best to tarnish my holiday shine. Luckily, I accepted the lesson with (some) grace and didn't get too worked up. Hindsight is ever perfect, but I wish I had not been quite so tied up in going whole-hog on handmade gifts. Or at least, I wish I had spent more time in coming up with light-weight gift ideas!

Or skip the gifts all together
I know this is hard for others in our lives, who aren't on the simplicity path. But the recent years of economic uncertainty have made people more open to giving less. Ask your family to draw names out of a hat or only give gifts to children under 18. Plan a secret Santa at work instead of buying for everyone.

If you give a gift, go for experiences and necessities (like clothes) over toys and knick-knacks. Give consumables (candles, food, bath products) if you can. Ask your friends and family what they really need, and then act on their honest answers. You know what I wish people would give me this year? Stationery, and long taper candles. These are things I use often, and use up. Last, consider donations to someone's favorite charity. Or, thinking about the natural disasters recently, ask your family and friends to donate to charities in Puerto Rico, Florida, and Texas in lieu of giving you gifts. It's a wonderful feeling to know you are doing some good in the world.

Not every party requires your presence.
If you, like me, get really stressed when every weekend in December is full of commitments, give yourself permission to skip a party or two (or all of them). The show will go on, without you. Let that be a relief and not a sadness. Yes, it's important to participate in functions for the organizations that you contribute to (including your work). But, it's not more important than your family, your sleep, or your health. Bow out of a few functions and stay at home for a PJ-wearing, nap-taking, book-reading blast of your own.

Reconsider holiday "traditions." Create new traditions that reflect your current values.
I have a couple of traditions at the holidays that are incredibly important to me. On Christmas Eve, I make chili. As I stir the big pot, I think of my great-grandfather and the incredible gift he was to our family. His spirit lives in me as I prepare that meal.  This is a ritual that costs me little, connects me to the spirit of the season, fills me with gratitude, and grounds my holiday around routine and tradition. It's deeply spiritual, nostalgic, and special to me.

In the last couple of years, I've been re-evaluating my other holiday "traditions." Many I have let go of, as they cost too much and stress me out more than they nourish my soul. But a handful have become my rock around which the holidays are mapped out.

To find these special moments, imagine you were celebrating the holidays in a foreign country, with only your immediate family. What would you bring with you, and why? What would be the most essential plans that you hold onto that season? Perhaps the annual snowball fight with your kids is essential, or the midnight stroll under the stars with your spouse. Decide what you must keep, and then let the rest go. If you need more, create new rituals that bring to life your values and priorities.

What are you doing to de-stress the upcoming holiday season? Let me know in the comments!